Today I had a "class", (meaning it was an online class assignment), and we learned about blogs. We learned about the ways of the future and the forever changing and updating of personal information put onto the web to never, ever, EVER be taken off. However, this doesn't really stop me, because I know that though I do have a blog, it is not read very often, mostly because I struggle in the actual keeping of it.
I was thinking today of the changes going on in my life. Almost two years ago I moved to Cedar City after years of dealing with friends who were fun, but didn't treat me well. I had just finished hair school and gotten my license and was being depressed at home in my room, living a hermit life. My parents were worried, because they are good.
I didn't wait to move to Cedar City in the fall, but instead I moved into my older sister Trisa's apartment with her and her roommates. I was so lucky to have been immediately introduced into an amazing group of people that were each unique and talented and wonderful in their own ways.
Trisa was wise enough to let me be my own person. I was so grateful to her for not being weird about me joining the group. I had never had good friends like this who welcomed me for who I was and didn't expect me to be anything that I wasn't or offer more than they intended to give me in return.
I got a newfound confidence and made several friends in the ward and I loved my bishopbric who were all amazingly similar to my Dad and my Uncles in their mannerisms and sense of humor. I loved it!
Now almost two years later, most of these friends that I met that day have either married, or moved away. Everybody has a life of their own and seems to be moving in wonderful directions. My own sister has even went and found herself a man that she loves and wants to spend eternity with. I don't have a lot of friends who love me and want to spend a lot of time with me daily anymore. I don't have a lot of close roommates or neighbors nearby that I can call up whenever I have a desire to do something, in fact I do most things alone. I am very happy for my sister and am glad that she found somebody to make her happy and to love her like she deserves, but I am definitely sad and scared for her to move away. She is moving away forever in 7 days.
I thought about telling my bishop who is the father of the ward my worries. I thought of telling him that I have tried to make friends in the ward, but my job keeps me from being able to attend a lot of the activities that would help me meet people. I thought of telling him the inevitable thing about girls, and the fact that most girls in packs are actually truly terrible and though many of the girls in the Relief Society are kind, when they get together I experience a terror. I flash back to my High School life where drama and gossip were all that mattered and where people hurt each other with words or lack of caring. But I know what anyone would say... I would say it to somebody in my position.
I would say Heavenly Father blesses us with the right kind of people in the right times to help us either be comforted and lift us up when we need help, or to challenge us to make us be better. He wants Trisa to be happy and he understands that what makes her happy and what is best for her, may be hard for me. I would tell myself that if I am patient and just kept being faithful and doing my best to attend ward functions that friendships will be made and life can move on happily. People will continue to be selfish, but that doesn't mean I have to be. I shouldn't expect all people to be decent, but that shouldn't stop me from being a good friend and a good person. I would say that I am tough and I can do anything with the Lord.
I am so grateful to the people that have made my life so wonderful. I have been so blessed to have experienced relationships with so many interesting and unique people that have so much to offer this life. Though I will forever miss my times that my sister and I had here in Cedar City together, and the chance that I had to truly get to know such an amazing person. I will now have a chance to hopefully be even a smidgen of the kind of friend that she was to me, to help others. She is an amazing example and I love her.
I didn't wait to move to Cedar City in the fall, but instead I moved into my older sister Trisa's apartment with her and her roommates. I was so lucky to have been immediately introduced into an amazing group of people that were each unique and talented and wonderful in their own ways. 
